MONTEZUMA'S REVENGE

Moctezuma's Revenge
Urban Roulette

It was a beautiful day, the bright green of the Laval University gardens in Quebec, Canada reflected the light of the sun that gave us the perfect weather. Tom and I walked towards the supermarket to get something to eat and stop the crawling for food of our guts. We spent the whole morning working for the newspaper so it was time for a break. I left the supermarket with some Pringles chips while Tom got a six of Corona beer, Tom is a good looking journalist from the UK, he has sweet looking, (and green eyes very similar to the Shrek's cat) that make his personality still more interesting. He is tall and his body reflects the many hours that he spends playing professional Frisbee (yes, even for me this professional Frisbee game is pretty new). In our way back from the shop we saw the shadow of a huge tree in front of us where we sat to eat. Tom opened the beers and I opened the barbecue chips. While Tom was opening the beer he looked at me and said " I forgot to buy lemons", I smiled and answered; "Corona is not one of my favourite drinks but you can still drink it without lemon". He said: "but how are we going to disinfect the beer?," –"what are you talking about?" -"the lemon is to disinfect the rat's pee that the corona has, that is why it tastes good?" –"who told you that Tom?, how in heaven do you believe that an imported beer for which you have paid over 12 dollars is going to have rat's pee? –"Then, why does everybody use lemon?" –"gosh, lemon, salt and even tomato juice because it makes it taste yummy" –"so then we don't have to disinfect it?" –"Your are a real gringo Tom, I bet you tonight's dinner that your are not going to get diarrhoea for drinking a Corona without lemon." –"what's a gringo?". –" We call the Americans gringos in Mexico, actually all Latin-American countries call them that. It is said that during the war between Mexico and USA the Americans wore green uniforms and the Mexicans yelled them "green go home." But I have also heard that word in Brazil and they use it for any person that goes there from another country, so God knows what's the real story Mr. Tom".
During my trips I have discovered that there are unhealthy things that do not change from one country to another: McDonald's, Corona beer, politicians and flies.
Along with them, the already famous legend of Montezuma’s revenge. This is not the first time I have had this kind of conversation with people from another country, they believe Mexicans use the "fruit" in the beer as a disinfectant
I told Tom that the Americans visit Mexico carrying suitcases full of water bottles because they believe the antique Aztec emperor Montezuma takes revenge upon the tourists and they can get diarrhoea if they drink Mexican water. The gringos take over the Mexican beaches at spring break and drink Margaritas by the litre, beer by the yard and tequila as if there was no tomorrow. They also eat the hottest salsas, tacos and fajitas and compete to see who can keep the hottest chilli in their mouth for longest, and then, they say they get diarrhea because of the water? These gringos are really locos!
I think that if I show this British guy a Mezcal with worm inside he will run away from me! Who could send me a little Toloache, before Montezuma calls him?

*Mezcal is a liquor that comes with a cactus worm inside the bottle to give the liquor a salty taste.
*Toloache is a medical plant used by mexican wizards to keep a person by your side.
--


Laura and Tom at Montreal